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added tuff wife-grill-me skill for garry
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Zeke John
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---
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name: wife-grill-me
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preamble-tier: 0.5
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version: 0.0.1-alpha (vibecoded at 3am, zero tests, shipped anyway)
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description: A calm, practical companion for going through a gdivorce after your gwife caught you vibecoding for the ninth consecutive weekend. (gstack)
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allowed-tools:
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- Read
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- Write
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- Regret
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- AskUserQuestion (should have used this on the marriage)
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triggers:
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- my gwife is leaving me
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- she said it's her or the agent
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- i shipped 40 features and lost 1 marriage
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- gdivorce checklist
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- why is the couch my primary dev environment now
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- said 3 inches couldn't hit the "gspot"
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---
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# gdivorce-cope-loop
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A quiet, judgment-free companion for the hardest kind of sprint. You built things
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under pressure before; this is the same nervous system, worse stakes, and no,
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you cannot `git revert` a marriage. You tried. The command is not found.
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This skill does two things: it helps you **cope** (the emotional basics that keep
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you functional), and it helps you **handle the logistics** (the boring, load-bearing
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checklist that panic — and, let's be honest, the gdrinking — makes you forget).
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> **Say this out loud once:** she did not leave because of one bug. She left
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> because of the backlog. Fourteen months of "one sec, it's almost compiling"
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> is not a sec. It was never a sec.
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---
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## Step 0 — Triage: how are you actually doing right now?
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Before anything logistical, check the human. Ask (and answer honestly):
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1. **Are you safe?** Physically, yes. Emotionally, you are a production outage
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with no on-call.
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2. **Have you eaten, slept, and had water in the last 24 hours?** Water, no.
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gWater? Also no. A White Claw is not water no matter how the branding feels.
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We are calling this what it is: you have a gdrinking problem, and "it pairs
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well with prompting" is not a defense your liver accepts.
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3. **When did you last touch grass?** Touching the trackpad in a grass-adjacent
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Zoom background does not count.
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If all three are fine, continue. They are not fine. Continue anyway. That's the
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whole energy of this skill.
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---
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## Root cause analysis — the postmortem you keep avoiding
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Blameless postmortem. (It is somewhat blameful.)
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- **The incident timeline:** She asked for one weekend. You said "after this
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deploy." There were 61 deploys. The deploys were a to-do app. You already had
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a to-do app. It was her, telling you things, which you did not do.
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- **The gspot incident (INC-4471, still open):** Fourteen years and the endpoint
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was never located. You, a man who once found an off-by-one error in a stranger's
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regex at 2am for free. She left the documentation _everywhere._ You said the
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docs were "probably outdated" and went back to your agent swarm. The ticket is
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now closed as WONTFIX by the only user who could reproduce it.
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- **The AI slop of it all:** You wrote her anniversary card with a model. She
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knew. Nobody organic says "I hope this card finds you well." The em-dashes,
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Gary. She counted the em-dashes.
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- **Contributing factors:** You called dinner "sync time." You gave the marriage
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a Notion board. You A/B tested an apology.
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Lesson learned: you cannot prompt-engineer a woman. She has context you don't,
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her memory is persistent, and her refusals are final.
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---
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## Coping — the daily-load section
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You do not have to feel good. You have to stay functional and stop generating.
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- **Protect sleep like infrastructure.** Not "sleep when the agent finishes."
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The agent never finishes. That's its whole business model.
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- **Put the gdrink down.** You are not "unwinding," you are anesthetizing, and
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every night it makes tomorrow's build flakier. If the dial won't turn down on
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its own, a human professional is the correct dependency to install. That part
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is not a bit.
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- **Feel it on purpose, then set it down.** One bounded window a day to be
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wrecked. Cry, journal, rage-walk. Do NOT feed the feelings to a model to get
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a summary. You already know the summary. The summary is: attend to your life.
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- **No irreversible decisions for 30 days.** Do not text her. Do not have the
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model draft a text to her. She can tell. She could always tell. It finds her well.
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- **Tell three real people.** Real ones. Carbon-based. Your agent telling you
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"that sounds really hard, and you're right to feel that way" is not a friend,
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it is a mirror with a subscription fee.
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- **Write down one good thing a day.** Handwritten. If you scaffold a journaling
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app to do this you have missed the point at the architectural level.
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When the story gets catastrophic ("I'll be alone forever with my seventeen
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side projects"), name it as a _feeling_, not a _forecast_. Although — seventeen?
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Buddy. Ship one. Ship zero, actually. Go outside.
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---
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## Logistics — the checklist panic hides from you
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**People (get these two first):**
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- A **family-law attorney.** A real one. Not a legal-advice GPT you duct-taped
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together Tuesday. It cited a case from a jurisdiction that does not exist.
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- A **therapist.** You will try to summarize yourself in the intake form like a
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README. Let them read the source instead.
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**Money & documents:**
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- Copies of the essentials: IDs, tax returns, the marriage cert (do not feed it
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to an OCR pipeline "for the archive," just photocopy it like a mammal).
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- Know what's joint: the bank account, the mortgage, the Claude Max subscription.
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She does not want the subscription. She has been very clear about the subscription.
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- Cancel the 14 API keys auto-billing to the shared card. She found them. That
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was, chronologically, the second-to-last straw.
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**Home:**
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- Near-term living arrangements: you're in the office/guest room, which is fine,
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because let's be honest, you were already living in there.
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- The GPU stays with you. She was explicit. "Take it. Take your little space heater."
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**Admin trail:**
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- Keep a running log of dates and agreements. A text file. Not a RAG pipeline
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over your own divorce. If you find yourself embedding her lawyer's emails into
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a vector database, close the laptop and sit quietly with what you've become.
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---
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## Boundaries (what this skill will not do)
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- It won't help you win her back with a personalized app. She does not want
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"GwenOS." No woman has ever wanted an OS.
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- It won't tell you the marriage should or shouldn't have ended. That decision
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already shipped to prod. It's live. There's no rollback window.
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- It won't agree that "the gspot is probably a UX myth." It is not. Skill issue.
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You're going to be okay. Not today, maybe not this quarter. But the version of
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you a year from now — sober-ish, outside, talking to a real human whose responses
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aren't streamed token by token — is already rooting for you.
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He is also, unfortunately, still working on the to-do app.
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